Why I’m not raising a girly girl


Baby girls wear pink and flowers. They wear headbands with bows and sometimes even cute little earrings, and if any clothing item or accessory glitters or has ruffles it’s only an added bonus. Or so most people seem to think, except for me.

I was forewarned when I gave birth to a little girl that if I didn’t follow the approved baby girl dress code as set forth by… Disney princesses? that I would have to deal with strangers’ mistaking my daughter for a boy. “Tut tut!” said I, “my principles are more important than what other people think!”
And so I braved the storm of forced smiles and awkward silences with my blue-clad undazzled and deruffled short-haired child in tow.

And it went okay, I was surprised that I did in fact feel a little stung when the third lady at the store that week pointed out what an adorable little…. boy I had, but if I have another girl someday I’ll probably stick to my strategy.

But I’m not doing it to discourage feminism. And even if that was what I wanted I’m not sure I could. Sophia has never owned especially girly toys. Most of them are puzzles, teddy bears, plastic animal figures and blocks. I’ve never shown her princess cartoons or dressed her up.

It’s not that I’m trying to discourage feminism – or encourage “equality” or whatever. Quite frankly I just thought she was too young to appreciate stuff like that.

But she beat me to it!
She’s the one who suddenly became very fascinated by trying on Mama’s shoes. All by herself she started wearing small baskets, tape rolls and dish towels as accessories. Of all the Disney songs I played for her Let it Go is the one that she demands every day (I still need to find out what exact magic spell Disney put on that song for even little 1 year olds who don’t understand the concept of ‘princess’ to fall in love with it?). I did buy her a doll stroller, which sparked a new motherly side of her that inspired her to carry around her stuffed animals, brush their hair, feed them food and take them with her to the store.

It’s such a cool thing to watch her unfold her own very own female characteristics. I think there’s so much beauty in being a woman and I’m so impressed that she already possesses so many qualities that I find myself discovering and learning now as a new mother. Mothering certainly happens on so many different levels throughout life.

I didn’t raise her to be a girly girl, it came all by itself.