Is being a stay-at-home mom enough?

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I just wanted to share a few thoughts about an issue I’ve been dealing with lately.

So, it has always been my ambition to be a stay-at-home mom. (I know, can that really be an ambition? All I know is, it certainly won’t happen if you don’t strive for it.) Throughout my entire life my own mom has been a walking and talking example of the power of the mother in the home, and I, being her eldest child, got a front-row view of all the ups and downs that came with it. The steep finances to the extra comfort at home. Her hard work within those walls made our house a magical place and it became my dream to someday (more…)

Back to school, Mama!

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I was just scrolling through my Instagram feed and came across a post I had written last year on the topic of my lack of education. It brought a smile to my face because I’m happy to say that just a few months later I was able to go back to school.

In September last year I started my first semester of what is called the Pathway program. It is in collaboration with BYU-Idaho and helps you qualify for their online degrees without having to attend the school on campus beforehand. So hopefully after three semesters of doing Pathway I will be able to finally start working towards (more…)

The terrible twos are hard

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We’re going through the process of reorganizing all our pictures on Google Photos, which includes emptying our phones, camera, laptops, Dropboxes, and other random platforms photos are hiding out on. It’s a bit of hard work but it is so much fun too. Seeing the last few years of your life summed up like that just makes you realize that progress is real and more dramatic than you feel. That rhymed.

Just looking through the pictures of Sophia this past year shows how many things have changed – and especially how much she has changed!

Man.. being the mother of a two-year-old is hard. (more…)

In her arms…

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Ever since I got pregnant with Sophia we have started using the terms “Baby #1, Baby #2” etc – or if we’re feeling extra street we go for “B1 and B2”. It’s a quite nice way of objectifying your children in a systemized way, isn’t it?

So I just put B1 down for a nap. It only took her 1,5 hours to fall asleep because she just won’t stop talking these days. Conversation seems to be her favorite thing, and she’s never put out by the fact that there isn’t really anything to talk about. She’ll just bring up the tree she can see or a random person we saw in church on Sunday. Just mentioning a name or object will do – then she passes the ball to me. But when we’re lying down for a nap she quickly adapts to the one-way conversation and feels no discomfort with keeping it going for long minutes at a time. Yep, she’s not really a B anymore at all.

But eventually we reach the point when (more…)

Why I’m not raising a girly girl

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Baby girls wear pink and flowers. They wear headbands with bows and sometimes even cute little earrings, and if any clothing item or accessory glitters or has ruffles it’s only an added bonus. Or so most people seem to think, except for me.

I was forewarned when I gave birth to a little girl that if I didn’t follow the approved baby girl dress code as set forth by… Disney princesses? that I would have to deal with strangers’ mistaking my daughter for a boy. “Tut tut!” said I, “my principles are more important than what other people think!”
And so I braved the storm of forced smiles and awkward silences with my blue-clad undazzled and deruffled short-haired child in (more…)

A little bit about my lack of education

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A few weeks ago in church we talked about the importance of education. When the subject was announced I cringed a little in my seat and braced myself for 45 minutes of feeling sad and guilty that my non-existent bachelor’s degree is currently a jumble of mismatched courses with no hope of being put together anytime soon.

I’ve been feeling a little self-conscious lately about not having an education. I’ve especially felt overly sensitive if I’ve accidentally (more…)

I discovered a bad mom inside me – she’s real // Part 1

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Everyone always talks about ‘terrible twos’ but my daughter has ‘PMS 18 months’. It doesn’t sound as good but it’s true. And it seems like the meltdowns always come when I’m battling an inner meltdown myself. And it’s like meltdown + meltdown = monster. And the monster is not the toddler. It’s me.

I imagine that the Hulk got pretty freaked out when he transformed the first time (I don’t know, I don’t remember the movie), but it definitely scared the living daylights out of me when I first felt the ripples and the shutters. What scared me the most (more…)